from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Randomize
