absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
