a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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