i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
If I die, sorry about rent.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Randomize
