sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
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