He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
