this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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