maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
