we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Randomize
