soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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