Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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