Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
