That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
