i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
