Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
