South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
