There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Randomize
