i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize