it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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