That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
