You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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