Slut skills are useful in every country.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
