DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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