So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Randomize
