She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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