I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
