idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
