Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Randomize
