Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
