Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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