You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
