So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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