So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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