Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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