Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Randomize
