bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Randomize
