WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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