You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
