Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
