Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Girls should come with a carfax report
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
