i think i have herpe
just one?
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize
