I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Randomize
