I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
