"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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