Define "chronic" masturbator.
I puked a lego.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
should my penis look like a turkey
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
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