Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
