My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
