He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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