Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
