The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I just forgot I was standing up.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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